in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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