Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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