Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
