So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
