Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Enjoy the penises
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
