I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize