I could make wine with my vomit
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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