is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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