I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
