Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
