you guys were way drunker than both of me
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
