We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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