the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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