Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Randomize
