His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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