maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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