i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
