any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize