Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I think your dad took our porno
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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