She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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