i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
