I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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