Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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