they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
