I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
