we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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