It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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