bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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