whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize