Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize