every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Is Oprah even human
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
