Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
