remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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