i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Alive.
So much puke
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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