What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
