Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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