My liver just broke up with me...
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
