I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
