So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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