Having a random hookup so left but love u
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
