just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
do herpes really smell.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
