if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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