she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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