You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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