real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
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