You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
