she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize