Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
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