so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Randomize
