so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
